Relational Mindfulness

What it is

Mindfulness is often taught as something we do alone — sitting quietly, attention turned inward. That foundation matters. But most of us don't lose our mindfulness while sitting on a cushion. We lose it in conversation, in conflict, in the presence of someone we love or fear or don't understand.

Relational mindfulness builds on that inward foundation and extends it into contact with others. What happens when we try to stay present while speaking, listening, being impacted? What does it mean to practice when we're in conflict, navigating difference, or trying to belong somewhere?

For many people, this is where practice gets harder and more interesting.

What we practice

• Mindful listening and speaking
• Staying connected to the body while in relationship
• Noticing reactivity, defensiveness, withdrawal, pleasing, protection, or disconnection as they happen
• Curiosity about conditioning — the ways race, culture, gender, power, and belonging shape how we relate
• Learning to remain present without overriding nervous-system limits
• Connection with land, nature, and the more-than-human world
• Bringing Buddhist practice into ordinary relationships and community life
• Practicing with conflict, intimacy, vulnerability, joy, and repair
• Relational practice in pairs, groups, communities, retreats, and everyday life

Why I teach this

Some of the most reliable places we lose mindfulness are in relationship. And relationship is also where practice can deepen in ways that sitting alone doesn't always reach.

When we bring awareness into how we speak, listen, react, and repair — noticing the body's signals in real time, with another person present — practice starts to feel less like a private discipline and more like something that actually touches how we live.

My approach

My approach is trauma-informed and nervous-system-aware. I don't teach mindfulness as pushing through discomfort or staying present at all costs. The nervous system has real limits, and practice that ignores this can cause harm rather than support it.

I'm also attentive to the social dimensions of practice — how race, culture, identity, and power shape what's possible in relationship and community. This isn't a separate topic from Buddhist practice. It's woven into it.

I teach relational mindfulness through Dharma Homies, retreats, teacher trainings, groups, and one-on-one work.